As part of the whole bipolar/being medicated thing, I get to be a pincushion and have blood tests every 3 months or so to make sure my medication is at theraputic levels and to make sure it's not affecting my body and whatnot too much. It's another superfun aspect of the disorder.
Anyway, since I started my role as pincushion about 3 years ago, I've had an absurd amount of ridiculous stories come out of it. Almost every single blood test has been it's own crazy adventure and I'd like to share those with all of you.
Here's story 1:
I had recently moved to the area I live in now, recently started with my doctor, and was going for my first blood test in this neighborhood. I hadn't started working yet so I decided to go during the day to avoid crowds since this lab didn't accept appointments. Now, as a little background, I have relatively low blood pressure and it's not really the best idea for me to give up a lot of blood. You know, if I can avoid it. I meant to go during the morning, but I was being a lazy ass and didn't get going until around 1:00 or so. I also didn't know if I was supposed to be fasting or not, so I decided to err on the side of caution and hadn't eaten. Generally, just to get med levels tested it's not necessary, but for a full blood panel, that's standard procedure. I've been burned before by that rule.
So I make my way to the lab, where despite my careful planning about time, I find the space jam packed full of people and I'm told I can't do anything but sit and wait. After an hour of this, while my stomach grumbles away, I'm finally called in and hold out my arm to start the draining. For reasons still unbeknownst to me, they ended up taking 6 vials worth of blood, which is a lot comparitively, and it left me feeling not so fresh. The nurse told me I was looking a little pale and asked if I wanted to stay there for a couple minutes, but at this point I was tired, hungry, and just ready to leave so I said I was fine and walked out. As I was walking to my subway station I started feeling even more tired and woozy and started to get a little nervous about it. I got to the escalator and held on to the side as I headed downstairs and.....
Next thing I know, I'm on the ground with a homeless guy and a cop looking at me from above. The second I saw that, I wished I would black out again. The homeless guy looked at me astonished and said, "I saw you fall! All of a sudden you just keeled over and fell down the last few steps of the escalator." Meanwhile, the cop was giving me a couple of suspicious glances and said, with a meaningful glance at my arm where a very small bruise and needle mark were apparent, "Is everything ok? Is there a problem here?"
I struggled to my feet, bright red and wishing I could sink through the ground, and managed to assure both the cop and the homeless guy I was fine and explained I had just had a blood test on an empty stomach. Then after getting some water and diet coke from the drugstore, I took my ridiculous self home.
The End....for now.
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