Living Life

When watching tv with my roommate tonight, something came up that reminded me that when I was high school, I went through a pretty intense phase of wanting to drop out of school and start living what I considered an "adult" life.  It actually got to the point where I brought it up with my mother a couple times, which is a sign of what a big deal it was as during that time, I was not highly communicative and especially not with my family.
I bet you anything my mom doesn't remember this at all.

The thing is, I wasn't part of a circle where it was part of the social norm, or structure I guess, for people to drop out of high school. Really quite the opposite I went to a fairly prestigious all girls private boarding school where most of the student body came from well-off families and dropping out....well it really just wasn't done.  And it most certainly wasn't done in my family.  I didn't want to quit because I disliked my school; I actually really enjoyed going there and I had a lot of friends.  What I started to hate was the idea of being in school, of continuing to learn what I was told to learn, and then the idea of living the prescribed lifestyle of college and business job and etc., etc.  I was never a big fan of school as I found it boring, but I was able to deal with it and focus on all the other parts of school (besides classes) I did enjoy.  I think I just became afraid I would be bored for the rest of my life.  That's actually I fear I still have - being bored for too much of my life.

I remember thinking that I would be entirely satisfied by moving to some tiny town, getting whatever job was around, and just living my life.  Perhaps I would have been.  But I sincerely doubt it would have been as smooth and easy as I kept projecting in my head.  It's easy to glamorize things when you're not having to live them.